I can't believe June is here and 2018 is half way over already. At the start of every year I make goals for myself, and with the midway point here, I like to check in and see where I'm at. When 2017 was wrapping up, I felt like I was finding my footing in a lot of areas of my life. I had high hopes for 2018, but this year has thrown me for a loop. To be honest, recently I've been feeling a lot like this sad cat on the sweatshirt I am wearing in these photos.
At the end of March, I lost my job because the brand I was designing was eliminated. Everything feels very up in the air right now, and I'm caught between struggling to find another design job in an industry that is currently very unstable, and questioning if I even want to stay in fashion or if I want to take this time to explore a new career path.
Since I'm not working a full time job at the moment, I've had a lot more time to dedicate to my blog and Instagram, which has been great since I enjoy creating content so much. However, I've been feeling discouraged recently with my growth and engagement rates on Instagram. I know I shouldn't let the numbers dictate my outlook. However, it's hard to not feel like this is another area of my life that is also unstable or unsuccessful.
Now believe me, I know that things could be A LOT worse. And while I feel down in the dumps about certain areas of my life right now, I've actually accomplished a lot of personal goals so far in 2018. Already this year I've traveled to Memphis and Miami for the first time. I've gone back to dance classes, one of my passions that I've neglected over the last several years. I also got to be an extra for a tv show (The Marvelous Mrs Maisel, which happens to be one of my favorites) which is something I've wanted to do since I moved to NYC five years ago.
The point of this post is not to complain about my failures or brag about my experiences, but to remind myself or anyone reading this that life isn't measured solely by job titles or Instagram analytics. There's something to be said for personal accomplishments, and we should acknowledge these life experiences as well. I often get caught up looking at people my age and feeling like they're so much more accomplished than I am because they have their own home, husband, kids or successful career, all of the accomplishments that society traditionally rewards. But it's important to remember that everyone has a different path. Not everyone accomplishes the same things in the same time frame, and that's okay. For now, I'm going to continue to put myself out there, keep my fingers crossed and just enjoy the ride.
If you're interested in shopping my sweatshirt, you can find it here:
Sweatshirt: c/o Yummy Cactus
Collared Shirt: Vintage; Skirt: Madewell; Sneakers: Madewell; Headband: American Apparel
Location: Schnackenberg's (Hoboken, NJ)
6/6/2018 03:46:20 am
What an open & personal post! Life is def full of so many experiences (good & bad) that teach us and help us grow. I’ve been loving the content you’ve been sharing recently and think you’ll def find your next opportunity soon and it will be rewarding! Also, which episode were you in?!!!!!!! I binged watch that show and loved it so much.
Great post! I really like your blog. It’s different & fun. And I hear ya’ on all counts here. Valid feelings no matter what level you’re on. But you’re right about everyone walking their own path. Funny, I’m writing about the same thing but in a different way. Love your style. So creative & your Instagram is amazing! And I’m an actor so of course I have to congratulate you on Marvelous Mrs Maisel! With you look / style you cold def get tons more extra work. Lots of projects out there calling for it. Best of luck!
6/6/2018 07:55:01 am
I feel a lot like you do. I currently do freelance work, which has its benefits, but I really want to do something more. I fall into the trap of comparison, as well, and always feel like I’m so far behind everyone else I know. Hang in there because you’re smart and unique, and know that you’re not alone in all of this.
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